How to help your children cope during a divorce?
The American Psychological Association estimates that 40-50% of first marriages end in divorce. Second marriages have an even higher divorce rate, with 60-67% of second marriages ending in divorce. It is undeniable how difficult and often painful it is to process this situation, not only for the parents but also for the offspring of the once happy union. Research suggests that divorce adversely affects children’s emotional, psychological, physical, and social well-being.
Here are some of the adverse effects of divorce on children and some tips on how parents can help them cope during these challenging times:
Divorce can be emotionally traumatic for children. They may feel a range of emotions, including sadness, anger, anxiety, and confusion. It may even come to a time where they may blame themselves for the split of their parents, thinking that they were the ones who caused it some may even feel abandoned by one or both parents.
In other cases, children may even experience clinical depression and other mental health issues as a result of the divorce; it is important for parents to be aware of their children’s current emotional state and to provide support and reassurance.
Divorce can also have a significant impact on the behaviour of children. They may become more withdrawn or aggressive, have difficulty sleeping or eating, or struggle academically. To cope with their emotions, they may engage in risky behaviours such as drug or alcohol use.
Parents must be aware of changes in their children's behaviour and seek help if necessary. Children struggling to cope with their parents' divorce may benefit from counselling or therapy.
Divorce can also impact children's relationships with their parents, siblings, and other family members. They may feel compelled to take sides or struggle to maintain close relationships with both parents.
It is important for parents to talk to their kids honestly and openly about the divorce and reassure them that they will still be loved and cared for. When possible, parents should encourage their children to maintain relationships with both parents and to spend time with extended family members.
Divorce can also have a practical impact on the lives of children. They may need to relocate, change schools, or adjust to a new routine. These transitions can be difficult for children, especially if they are already emotionally troubled.
By being patient and understanding, parents can help their children adjust. They should stick to a routine and give their children a sense of stability and security. It is also critical for parents to listen to their children's concerns and involve them as much as possible in decisions that affect their lives.
Sometimes, divorce can be inevitable and may be the best option for the whole family. Although, as with every major life change, there will be unique consequences. It can significantly impact children’s overall well-being, and parents must help them maneuver in situations they have no control over. Emotional support, maintaining open and honest communication, seeking professional help if necessary, and helping children adjust to practical life changes can help them navigate and thrive in their new family dynamic.